Gang Stalking is a new form of social bullying and cyber terrorism. Cyber bullies play a form of a Machiavellian game — targeting an innocent victim, branding them publicly as a violent, dangerous, deranged, or drugged-out criminal, then recruiting friends and family to come cyber stalk their social media pages. If the person lives locally and can be physically stalked, harassed, and bullied, strangers will be sent to do so to unnerve and frighten or cause fear in a target the same way. When a Machiavellian thinker with Malignant Narcissist and Psychopath tendencies decides to target what is known as a Narcissistic Rival for this sort of social destruction and physical torture, it tends to go on for months — sometimes years. In the case of the most mentally compromised of predators, torture of a preferred scapegoat target might continue to happen for decades.

The award for best fake profile goes to… drum roll, please…


Was I imagining things? Was I reading too much into ,my online chat world? Had I experienced so much gaslighting that I couldn’t decipher fact from fiction? Or was this actually happening? Was everyone really taking PrEP in DC, even the early 20 somethings? Did EVERY single gay man in the DMV parTy and play?


Nothing but drugs, drugs, and more drugs in Virginia!


Who hits up a random stranger saying:

Smoke ice?

Or else the ever-so-popular:

You party?


And from 4 miles away mind you, my profile being nothing but a headless torso. If these profiles were real, then Ben and his friends would be going to town busting them all since they blatantly advertise it; instead, they’re surrounding me with these fake fucking profiles to gaslight me into hell on earth. That’s a great use of taxpayers dollars, right?

Remember: parTy with a capital T means meth, and poinTing refers to injecting meth. Why was the entire world on Grindr now hooked on hard-core drugs? This all came out of nowhere, and why Ben wasn’t going after this influx of drug users was beyond me. But the profiles wouldn’t stop trying to bait me into conversations about drugs — as if trying to portray me as Ben’s “false” version of myself that was some drug lord.

Finally I just started giving out Ben’s full name, address, SSN and date of birth to all the fake profiles asking to parTy, and it’s amazing how they all block me immediately… go figure.

I just don’t think all these profiles from Virginia asking me to parTy can possibly be legit, no way…


Who the hell puts this up as their profile? I mean this individual no offense if this is real, but he llooks dead to me.


I I swear every other profile that contacted me did so asking if I parTied and played (used meth and hooked up). It was so blatantly obvious that I was being bombarded by these drug-pushing phony profiles because if these were all real, then Ben and company would have their hand’s full fighting “true crime” instead of creating the appearance of “false crime.” They’d hit me up and quickly ask me if I did drugs…


…and the moment I’d say “no,” they’d quickly up and vanish.

This guy below was all gung-ho about meeting up and was en route, driving in his car to meet me when he asked again about drugs. His location was a mere 1000+ feet away from me, but when I responded with a “no,” he just stopped replying, never showing up.


Or a random VA profile’s subject line:


Does my headless torso for a profile reek of doing drugs that much? I’m like a magnet for people randomly hitting me up at all times for this shit. Or else perhaps this isn’t random but rather some stupid, perverse form of harassment and organized cyber-stalking?


They’d often be close like a mile – yet from Arlington or Alexandria, and speaking of parTying with drugs… go figure…


With the one above, he hit me up initially and then later on down the road, showing up in the “fresh faces” section the second time, meaning he’s brand-new to Grindr. He’s not brand-new to Grindr and he lives in VA, yet he’s showing up 500 feet away, asking me the same stupid questions about parTying yet again. Get some new profile pics stalkers!








Apex predator aside, I kept on experiencing strange, unexplained phone-events and hackings, everything from finding other people’s numbers linked to my apple ID or my phone number being forwarded to some strange number I didn’t know.

In one instance I’d just gotten an old apple ID out of recovery and noticed it was somehow linked to another phone number when I tried to add it into my phone. I typed the number into facebook and it brought up the lady below, whose head looks like it’s being irradiated. She worked in radiology, specializing in something with heart, lungs and bone. Creepy. I had 2-factor authentication set to my phone and was receiving the texts to confirm it was me. I called Apple and strangely, despite me receiving the 2-factor texts, they saw no record of my number being associated with this Apple ID. The only number they saw associated with it was hers. The said they’d investigate, they were very concerned by phone and couldn’t believe it. When I called back ultimately the representative said not to worry, and recommended I use an IP-blocker on my Iphone. I never even found an IP blocker and I searched high and low; regardless, it seemed like she’d told me that for the sake of having something to tell me and likely was silenced, being told not to tell me anything. I asked if I could have the evidence, for example, a screen shot showing what she initially found but she said she couldn’t due to Apple’s strong support of security. If that wasn’t an oxy-moron, I don’t know what is!


I had become completely frustrated and angry, there was no way to address one single problem and resolve it, and it seemed like I was being hit with 1,000 weird issues from every angle, every second of the day. I became anxiety-ridden, paranoid, and I eventually settled into a chronic state of fight or flight that’s never stopped. This wasn’t good for my body or my mind, and it’s like I went into “survival mode.” I was unable to concentrate at work or anywhere, I was unable to sleep at night, and I was unable to do anything but ruminate over what the fuck was going on, how this was possible, and how Ben seemed to have garnish more power than President Donald Trump. WTF?!?!?

And yet again, stupid HIV +, Poz, or whatever variation of it he was going by on any given day, reducing himself to a mere virus and constantly “tapping” me from a few feet away or hitting me up with vulgar remarks about leaving his poz nut inside me. Lovely, those are some tax dollars well spent, no?


Grindr’s terms of agreement specifically forbid impersonations… and Grindr is an app for GAY MEN, FTM and FTM transgendered people are included, but not lesbians, not straights, and most definitely, not female politicians. But somehow they weren’t doing their part on screening profiles.


One morning I decided to log on to the gay apps and noticed this one profile who had hit me up with the frequent “Sup” that I received from the fake profiles that often want to jump right in to hooking up without seeing a picture of my face first, which became a dead give-away to me that they were fakes. I’d still play along, sometimes I’d hope it was all in my head and these hot guys actually wanted to meet up for real.

But they all were let-downs, nothing but getting me hyped up only to vanish and leave me having wasted my time and feeling disappointed. Notice with the above, he imitated conversation, and this was before I woke up that day so I wasn’t even logged on. He he located my profile was odd given I wasn’t online, plus he’s super close-by. When I name-drop Ben — and not even his full name, just his first — I get no response after. He’d also hit me up on another phone app – Jack’d – which has completely different photos of me than Grindr, so there’s no way anyone could make that connection that both are mine. In the below, he tries to bait me into taking a photo of my feet, likely a means of trying to humiliate me for Ben or whomever else was watching.


6/3/18:  I had a record 5 bait and bails. I could be wrong – but so far I can usually predict the conversation trajectory from the start, as they all seem to follow 3 different scenarios, each one ending with me alone and having wasted my time. Yes – I’ve learned – don’t waste my time on here, well kinda learned; I still log on from time to time, but I don’t waste hours, I often just waste a few minutes hoping that it has returned back to normal, which would be reflective of the same happening to my life. Only it never does…

The below profile was talking to me for a few months now; finally he said he was coming over and I waited forever and he never showed. I thought it was related to Ben stopped talking to him. Then the profile contacted me twice this weekend – he’d say he wanted to meet, then not reply; finally I asked if he was in any way related to Ben – and he immediately disappeared. He’d only been chatting with me for several months but mentioning one three-letter name was all it took for him to disappear forever.


Gotta love “backdick4whitass,” which is clearly a typo. He hit me up, asking if he could “train” me on his frequent trips driving down from Philly to Florida.


Somehow Ben was aware of this bizarre profile, referencing him in an email he sent me. How could he possibly know about this profile? He could only know about it if he was behind it, or if he was somehow spying on my online chat conversations.

A year after backdick4whitass initially hit me up online, after I’d gotten a new computer with VPN and a firewall, he started hitting me up again. He lives in Philly, and wanted to “train” me as he claimed he drove to Florida often. Only he was insistent we communicate on Scype only…
Why Skype and not, say, Facetime? Nobody uses Skype anymore, it’s old school. Only after some reading, I discovered that Skype was an easy way to hack into someone’s computer and gain control. Go figure…

Then there were plenty random one-lined comments that were relevant — but how they knew of it seemed impossible. But they seemed to get it right with one-liners.


I am bald with a shaved head, too…


Oh look: the profile that’s on my bed the day someone broke in and stole my prepaid phone.


If I asked about Ben, they all seemed to know him, as well…


Or like with this guy below, he pulled a regular “Ben” move on me early on. He said he wanted to meet up and asked me to send my pics only he refused to send his. I asked if he was with Ben and company and he acknowledged knowing what I was referring to. I knew he’d suddenly block me and vanish in a few moments, which he did. You can see him below, his profile at the top in chatting with me and the time, as well. Then notice his profile has vanished completely from my conversation history minutes later. This has turned out to be 80% of the profiles that contact me on these goddamn apps and sites.


Suddenly Grindr had more trannies than I’d ever seen before, I had no clue what had gone on, or if these profiles were even real. Miss Peaches, below, would manage to create a new profile every other day it seemed.


I’m being gaslighted!


One day I was chatting with Ben, and he said he was going to see the movie “Pacific Rim.” I wasn’t on Grindr, but I was alerted that I had a message. I looked, it was Ms. Peaches, asking if she could “rim” me. WTF?!?! It seemed like someone was privy to my conversations and fucking with my mind honestly.


In another instance, I was chatting with the profile directly next to mine, and asked if he thought Miss Peaches / Booty was real. Suddenly she messaged me out of nowhere, per the below:

Come bend over.


I’m being gaslighted!









I was beginning to get a quick sense in conversing with these profiles if they were real or rather Ben-related within a few moments. I knew the ones associated with Ben would drag out the online chat with talks of meeting up only to suddenly bail on me at the end because they didn’t like my face pic or due to my HIV status or just stand me up. I could often just tell by the looks of them that they were fake. Hell, even the profiles would comment on themselves being fake for Christ’s sake!


Wow, Poz grew his hair out! If you can’t beat ’em, you might as well join ’em.


One day I saw Ben on Grindr and we began to bicker. Once he was logged off, I sent a message that I wanted to take back. I didn’t know how to ensure it was deleted on his end – did I need to just block him? Did I need to delete the app altogether, or maybe my entire profile? I ended up deleting the app and reinstalling it. Then I saw this guy online that I frequently spoke to from Britain. I’d asked him a few questions and then told him to hold on while I deleted the app (not my profile) and reinstalled, asking him what he could see on his end. His response seemed like he (or whomever0 was spying on my phone and gaslighting me yet again:

It’s all gone but because I reinstalled the app.


The same profiles would chat with me all the time, and they’d always make plans to meet up and then completely ghost me. I’d say weeks of my life have been wasted thinking I was about to meet someone that might be real — only the never are.


The profile below hit me up during the threesome phase, note how he mentions he needs to update his GPS so he doesn’t appear to be lying. You don’t update your GPS on Grindr, it updates automatically. This was a fake profile out attempting to prove I lied and really dig threesomes. As if that proves what? That I lie about liking threesomes? It’s Grind — half the shit people say is a lie – who gives a fuck? I ultimately ended up putting on my profile:

I’m being gang-stalked. Do not believe anything I tell you for the record.


Despite pointing out all these oddities to Ben, he insisted they were all normal. His email responses were immediate admissions of guilt based on how his language and tone alone. For a boy who could act out any role, when he tried playing the part of nun, telling me all was well, he always failed miserably.


No, these aren’t normal people, these aren’t just silly pictures, these are weird ass freakazoids for he most part


When I first moved to DC, all the profiles highlighted “safe sex only.” Those days were long gone. Now it seemed like unprotected sex was glorified everywhere I looked.


Suddenly everyone’s all about loads… kinda gross honestly… but to each their own.


Looking for loads, taking loads, and my favorite: group loads.


The pictures were just freakish, and so many odd balls always were hitting me up from VA. The shit they’d say was fucking retarded, like something a 13 year old in the anal stage would come up with. The goddamn recurring line about “good oral skills,” often from old men, was right out of Ben’s mouth.



I love to give intense oral and I can be topped safely if you are gentle. Let me give you a nice deep BJ! Let me give you a nice intense oral…

This one below… always wanting to give me them “world-class head skills…”


…so fucking annoying.


And always changing up profiles once blocked to return and say the same stupid shit again…


I figured if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em. So I responded to New Bottom / Skillful passion, whatever the fuck her name is, and she failed to respond to my actual message, instead recanting her same annoying lines about giving me the most passionate head. It’s like she’s automated or something.

Now despite there always being thousands of guys logged on to adam4adam, it was always the same goddamn fake profiles right beside me. And no, this wasn’t due to a geographical limit with my preferred part of time, either, they always seemed to show up and DC has a lot of gays — but somehow these gays always appeared right next to me.


There were also several online profiles I’d chatted with for years — and suddenly I realized they weren’t real. Their pictures had been recycled, they now showed up as escorts, and I started to notice all these “ads” on matched images sent to me that summer from unknown numbers harassing me. It’s like somehow adam4adam and Grindr were owned by the DEA or something. Juliblee79 below would always hit me up and bring up the subject of drugs. Next thing I know he’s an escort. Only it looks like this group got sloppy, as there are suddenly two escorts with the same Jubilee picture, one’s 39 and the other 25. This was very strange…


For some reason Grindr’s most annoying feature — getting “tapped” — was always being done to me by blatantly obvious fake profiles. It got to the point where the moment I’d hear the “tap” noise go off, I’d jump in fear as I’d been conditioned into associating it with organized stalking. These goddamn taps nearly drove me to drink…


Now, the craziness starts to come full-circle, well, kind of but not really. But I don’t thinking I’m reading too much into things here, either. Remember that first profile to hack my phone, the apexpredator? Remember the one profile, Malkyja, that I was certain was a mind-game as Ben’s nickname was Malkyja (almost), and the profile always had these back-handed compliments to share with me, just like Ben. I noticed something on the profile 9 months after our first chat, it was an update.

Notice he’s updated his headline to say:


Strange. Maybe I’m connecting dots that don’t exist, maybe the term apex predator is commonly used among profiles that seem to be fucking with my head? But these coincidences seemed too odd given how I’d kept track of these fake profiles on my periphery.

About 6 months later, I began to notice whenever I logged on to adam4adam, where there are several thousand gay men logged on in the DMV at any given time, there was Malkyja, always a few spots beside me. Coincidence? I said hi, and I found his response a bit odd, also:


Months after the above chat with Malkyja, I created a new profile on a4a. It had no identifiers, no pictures, nothing that could alert someone that it belonged to me. Amazingly, Malkyja hit me up right away, which I find strange: who hits up a completely blank profile?

And forget ye not how Malkyja’s profile now always references Apex Predators, like the screen name of the first profile that destroyed my phone.

Out of the several thousand guys online at any given moment in the DMV on, Malkyja still manages to find my photo-less profile and give his trademark line like clockwork:

Hey handsome, how r u?

Meanwhile, this is yet again another new profile with no photos, no identifiers, and no way to know its mine. Maybe Malkyja does this to every one of the several thousand guys on at any given time?

There seemed to be numerous profiles that would comment on my ravishingly good looks despite my profile having zero photos in it. Go figure…

An entire year after the googly-eyed Ben profile that followed me around had vanished, up pops another googly-eyed Ben profile, although he’s a year younger. But I’ve never seen another profile with googly-eyes in my entire Grindr lifetime, yet somehow ones with Ben’s same name always manage to locate themselves close to me on the app.

There was this one profile that constantly bothered me about doing drugs, and despite always blocking him, he’d somehow come back, similar to POZ. I noticed one day he’d returned with his profile sitting next to me (suggesting he was super close-by, as in right next door). I suddenly realized something strange in reading his profile:

Life is about improving shit… not proving shit.


It seemed like he was telling me I needed to improve my life as opposed to trying to figure out this mind-fuckery that was taking place on gay chat apps. That’s easy for someone to say whose life hasn’t been unconstitutionally high jacked and is being deprived answers, can’t get any explanation, and somehow has an ex-bofriend / narcissist that dedicated 3 entire years to destroying him over the word “narcissist.” 3 entire years over a word — and I’m supposed to think after all this time and the energy wasted, that he’s suddenly going to realize this is all a waste of time and needs to stop? It looks like he’s invested millions of dollars into whatever experiment is being carried out on me with the backing of the DEA, so fuck yeah, I want to “prove” this shit because proving it will be the ONLY way I ever get out of this nightmare. Ben and his police friends aren’t going to admit guilt and let me out in peace, that’s for sure. I wonder if ImaBeAwesome! wants to trade places with me? Then I noticed something familiar with his name: ImaBeAwesome!, which is nearly identical to that one version of the Apex Predator. I don’t think I’m reading too much into things in many of these profiles, I think someone’s hell-bent on gaslighting me into crazy-land, and that someone has to be Ben!


I started to notice something: guys I knew would hit me up on Grindr or Jack’d, and I’d see them appear as they sent me messages. I’d click on their profile through the message and they’d show up GPS-wise in close proximity. But if I went on the main grid screen that shows all guys logged on in close proximity, these guys didn’t show up there. Strange… it was as if I was being prevented from seeing “real guys” near me on my own… I could only see them if they initiated conversation with me, as they could see me but not the reverse.


Want Head? is my neighbor above; he started up a conversation and I checked on the main grid — he’s not showing up for me. I asked him to take a screen shot and did the same, we shared them — he can clearly see my profile in the grid whereas I can’t see his at all. I can only see him once he initiated conversation with me.


Or Cumnowwitme, I can’t see him showing up next to me super-close on the grid, but he can see me. I took a screen recording, and despite him being 1686 feet away, which I can tell from within the message, viewing his profile there, he doens’t appear on the main grid. So had I logged on looking for him, I wouldn’t see him; I only saw him because he contacted me.

The same on Jack’d with the guy below. He shows up in my messages and that’s how I can see he’s logged on and close-by, but go out to the main view, the grid, and he’s not showing up.


This sounds uber-retarded, but it’s as if someone was preventing me from viewing real, authentic guys on these apps; instead I was likely seeing just a bunch of wierd-ass random fake profiles instead. It seemed like someone was punishing me by preventing me from meeting real, authentic guys, it’s as if someone wanted to isolate me from the real world.

What are the goals of Gang Stalking? The goal is to isolate the target from all forms of support, so that the target can be set up in the future for arrest, institutionalization, or forced suicide. Other goals of this harassment is to destroy the target’s reputation and credibility. Make the target look crazy or unstable.


It has gotten to the point where I see profiles that for whatever reason look “off,” and I know they’re fake and part of this. Like this guy to the right, when I went to block him, something very strange happened, he shows up again further down the road, but with the same GPS location, he’s un-blockable. Click on the video and you can see: his profile is blocked, but then it reappears indefinitely. My instincts that something was “off” with this profile are further supported in the video below, which shows this profile is somehow different from all others and no matter how many times I block it, it reappears in a new location. That’s not normal at all and I only decided to record my screen after noticing this strange profile, which most might not find strange. It jumped out immediately to me. It just has the  look of these fake profiles to me, plus Jack’d is primarily younger and African American, so this profile stands out for that reason also. But you can’t deny something odd is taking place if this profile can’t be blocked, and keeps reappearing.


I decided to try again on another day. I saw one profile that caught my eye because of the one and only conversation I’d had with him. He was this buff guy that was “negative on PrEP,” and despite him not being able to contract HIV due to PrEP, the first question he asked me wasn’t “How are you?” or anything about me except — what’s your HIV-status. He then told me the one time he hooked up with a guy who was HIV-positive it made him nauseas and he threw up after; he said that to get HIV was his worst nightmare. This all came after disclosing I was HIV-positive. That conversation had stuck in my mind as it seemed so mean, so rude, and so nonsensical – he was on a medication that prevented HIV, why would he be so nasty to me? It’s not like DC has a law requiring me to disclose my HIV status to begin with; it’s not like I have any obligation to tell any profile I’m HIV-positive, that’s personal information that I personally believe I’m morally obligated to inform my partners of – but not every single inquiry from a chat site so the world knows my personal health business. Living with HIV is painful due to the stigma and I don’t put anyone at risk for getting it, I’m undetectable and I can’t even transmit the virus, but for some time I’d had this sense that someone was constantly trying to catch me not disclosing my status, as if then they could say:

You’re no better than your ex-boyfriend that gave it to you!

Wondering if maybe he was a fake this whole time, I decided to block him. The same exact thing happened.


I tried blocking several profiles I knew as being real and none of them were un-blockable. I asked to try this out on my neighbor’s phone and he had no issues blocking profiles. I sent an email to Jack’d, hoping that I’d get a response back unlike the crappy one I got from Grindr. I should have known… they didn’t even address my question at all. They just kept sending an email, asking me to respond below the hash marks, but never giving me any sort of response. Then they sent a follow up asking how I’d rate their customer service. Fuck that, this is soooo unfair and ridiculous!


I happened to check another app, and low and behold, every damn profile that hit me up was from Virginia. This one has some nudity, so please be warned it’s not for those with Catholic eyes!

A week after sending Jack’d my email that got no answer, I noticed something on the app: now it was my own profile, the picture of my headless torso, that kept repeating itself as I scrolled through. To this day it’s still doing it. I’ve checked with 2 other friends and looked at their profiles and theirs are totally normal. It’s just mine, almost as if it’s my punishment for inquiring.

To maintain my anonymity, that can be viewed by clicking on the image below and is password protected:


I realize this may sound like it’s all in my head but I don’t think so.


Having been with a narcissist, you come to realize that there are people in this world who are totally fake, they come off sweet as candy, but they’re as evil as the devil. They have complete disdain and animosity towards anyone that’s kind and has a conscience, and they yearn to see those people portrayed to the world as the worst of all mankind; they enjoy watching them suffer. The only way a narcissist makes himself feel better is watching experience pain, it’s what makes them feel good inside. Ben sat there and watched me lose my mind as this was happening yet said nothing, except for his occasional slip-up here and there. He knew I was slated to lose my job and said nothing to help me out, meaning he wanted me unemployed, unemployable and blacklisted. He blamed this all on me, as well; calling me delusional, saying I couldn’t hold myself accountable for my actions, etc… It’s funny because the informants I knew said the exact same thing, almost the same exact lines verbatim.

My boss would also say some of theses same catch phrases, also. I don’t know how to explain it but this is the essence of Narcissistic Personality Disorder and organized stupidity — fucking with and gaslighting one’s environment to throw them off, to cause them to look crazy, to influence them negatively, and then blame the victim as it’s all done in a manner that’s invisible and impossible to prove.


In the end, the bad guy wins, and the good guy is left with with his reputation worthless, he’s jobless, he’s blacklisted, he’s broke, he’s effectively left screwed for the rest of his life not to mention he can’t even get laid. After this experience, one begins to feel certain that there is no God nor justice in the world.

Ben left me to rot that summer after I caught him hacking into my phone, and I’ve been in a constant state of fight or flight ever since. Yet he and his associates, hell, even my boss — they all want to blame me completely for all this. How fucked up can this be?!?!


Ben deceived me into this relationship with him, with the support of cops, all so he could hack into my home computer network, interfere with my job, influence me negatively, and then broadcast it to the world meanwhile taking himself out of the equation. He was the entire reason I’d been plagued by “those people” for several years, now it made perfect sense why my neighbor, the one arrested, called me of all people from jail, lying about the safe and the storage unit in hopes that I’d get arrested for these officers. It made sense why the detective told me to be careful on those apps and websites back when I first met him in 2015. It’s no surprise that when the DEA agent contacted me and I mentioned Ben’s narcissistic smear campaign, her reaction is as follows below:


They say that in order for something as sophisticated as “organized stalking” to be executed, it would require the largest computer in the world, one with its tentacles into everything, and they claim with all going on with tracking and cell phones, it would also require extensive use of satellites. Coincidentally, Ben’s parents worked in computers for the Air Force and the Defense Information Systems Administration… he even bragged about his parents building the world’s largest computer system.


Guess what Ben’s was suggestion to help me in freaking out about the profile stalking was?

I’ll give you sex at least twice a week if you shut up about the profiles and stay off the apps.

Ben trying to get me to shut up about the fake profile stalking and him being behind it:

If you shut up about this crazy shit, I’ll marry you.


Ben even admitted to working with these agents, Ben foreshadowed each time I was contacted by these agents, Ben is the reason behind me losing my job (spoiler alert, my bad, it’s in an upcoming page!), Ben robbed me of three years of my life, destroyed my entire sense of reality, and managed to manipulate my life from behind the scenes with me having any way to prove it. Narcissists truly are without conscience, remorse, and they’re completely evil.


Plus Ben knew so many  of these profiles names, and that wasn’t possible unless he was involved. There were profiles calling me a narcissist, there were so many profiles that came right at me targeting my deepest insecurities, and then there was the whole gaslighting my reality with fake profiles glorifying drugs and money for sex. Fucking nightmare!!!


I realize this all sounds ridiculous, crazy, petty, juvenile and asinine, but this is the bread and butter of Narcissistic Personality Disorder, the disorder where everyone except the patient has to be on medication because they’re driven mad.


My 2 year relationship with Ben, my sexual awakening, the first love of my life I thought — was all a horrible joke gone awry, and supported by the federal government and law enforcement. Yup, you read that correctly.


Three years of my life went towards Ben’s smear campaign against me with the help of his parents and law enforcing, crime-creating flying monkeys. Yet they were all blaming me somehow for something so heinous and unbelievably cruel, it’s enough to make me vomit.

It was Ben I caught hacking into my phone for “those people.” It was Ben who claimed he’d returned to help me succeed with my new career and wanted to install a docking station, only things at work went completely sour, and then my computer network wouldn’t work, Ben blamed it on “those people,” and then I lost my admin rights, only to get them back after sending a text to the one detective bitching that I couldn’t even download I-Tunes and suddenly my computer turned itself off, came back on, and suddenly they were given back to me.


The process to have me fired began the day after I called the police about Ben, leaving me suspicious of foul play. Ultimately I discovered one of Ben’s police friend that directly communicated with my job, asking them to fire me. I didn’t know this until the end.


How the fuck could this be happening? Why would the world get so offended that I called out Ben when clearly I didn’t know — look at how much I loved and adored him when he returned. I put up with his abuse, he repeatedly left me suicidal, and in the end I’m the one who is left with the crime of all crimes — “organized stalking”?!?!?!? I lose my job and then I get effectively blacklisted for it, but there’s not a damn thing I can do, meanwhile the narcissist’s response to my predicament was the following:

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Okay: so it’s been proven. Well, kinda, maybe in theory, maybe in a manner that’s completely obvious. It still doesn’t prove the technical stuff, I still can’t prove Ben’s formal relationship but all the shit that goes into this nightmare of organized stalking is “confidential” information that’s allowed to be kept that way by the very people behind it. So as far as proving goes, I think I’ve done as good a job as anyone could ever do. This is truly a crime against humanity, a complete violation of one’s human rights, their constitutional rights, their civil rights and civil liberties. Why people fighting crime would spend millions of bucks to create a fake crime-ridden environment to place their enemies in indefinitely to help create crime is completely nonsensical.


So what does it mean? What’s the point of all this? It means that the world is being run by narcissistic sociopaths that could give 2 shits about you, don’t trust anyone, don’t believe what they say on the news, and whatever you do, do not piss off a narcissist!!! Examples other than mind:  mention the name “Rosie O’Donnell” 15 years later to Donald Trump and he’s immediately foaming at the mouth. Have you even seen or heard of Rosie, once the biggest (no pun intended) woman on American TV since her feud with the Donald? No, she was somehow made invisible by something that’s also invisible. It’s not like anyone can link her demise to Donald Trump because he did so covertly, pulling the strings he knew to destroy her. OMFG! Breaking news below!!!!


Or look at Kathy Griffin:  after her New Year’s joke she’s never worked again. They smear, they destroy, they gaslight, they defame, and they do it all in a way that’s invisible and keeps them from getting caught. They’re evil little demons!

Fuck Ben and his “my truths”! It must be nice to implement organized stalking in someone else’s life but, because the truth is what they “want” it to be versus what it actually is, it’s therefore “not real.” And that’s what caused our “relationship” to end despite the entire 2-year affair being nothing but smoke and mirrors from the start.


Narcissists destroy good people. Narcissists destroy bad people. Narcissists destroy everything they can because that’s what narcissists do.


First and second songs composed / performed by me.


My sincere apologies to any individuals whose profiles showcased that I’ve mistaken for being fake…